Friends…….Good Times…..Sad Times…..and Promise Made

Golly, October 2017 was my last blog post!  Until March 2018, the blogging lag was just that………….no interest in blogging, and some of the sewing projects never panned out.  Such is life.

Then on Tuesday, March 20, my world became a whirlwind - something sad, new, and a whole lot of responsibility to keep a promise made.  You see, my friend of 40+ years, “T,” had passed away, and I was notified by one of her doctors.  I was always listed as her “emergency contact” when she was off on a wonderful trip – generally somewhere abroad, and at any office that needed an “emergency contact” listed—which included her doctors.

Without going into all the details, she died alone, in her home, and was not found until her neighbors got worried that they had not seen her in a couple of days and called the police for a welfare check.  The last person she had talked with was her travel agent about an Alaskan cruise scheduled for May.

I had to go on automatic pilot at that point.  I contacted the Medical Examiner to find out what I had to do to get her body released to the funeral home.  She had one surviving brother in Washington state; I notified him, and he made the call back to the ME to notify that I was the Executor of her Estate, and I would be handling all things here in Texas.

The rest of the week was a blur – funeral home, burial, checking the status of her affairs at her condo in Dallas, hiring an attorney, cleaning out her condo and on and on.  We lived almost 50 miles apart.  We worked together almost 35 years and retired within a month of each other just over 10 years ago.  We went from seeing each other every work day and having a set lunch date once each week to meeting once/month for lunch after retirement.  Of course, when anything needed to be communicated, each of us was just a phone call away. 

I was with her during her breast cancer treatments, her back surgery, the loss of both of her parents, and her baby sister.  She was with me during the loss of my mother, surgery and hospitalization of my husband.  Funny that we didn’t have a great deal in common, (I sewed/ she traveled, I loved animals/she said she couldn’t even keep a plant alive) we were close and always could count on one another. 

About six or seven years ago, she asked if I would take care of her Estate when the time came.  She had the one brother but he was thousands of miles away from Texas and was not in the best of health.  After thinking it over (knowing what a big responsibility that could be) I agreed.  You see, I think she felt I was her “Texas family” a feeling I think I shared without really realizing it.

Four months of working in her condo, handling some needed repairs, sorting through papers and belongings, selling furniture, etc. finally resulted in putting her condo on the market for sale.  Fortunately, it sold rather quickly, and one major step was completed. 

Spending hours and hours in her condo was cathartic for me I think.  I relived conversations, events, etc, as I handled paper, and trinkets that had meaning to her. 

I’ve done such sorting and cleaning for family members upon their deaths, but this seemed different, and it was - A totally different relationship with “T.”  In my mind, we  should still have the opportunities for many more lunches and conversations, BUT, as we all know, life can change in an instant, and are any of us really prepared?

Retreating to my sewing room for a few projects here and there during this stressful period of time has helped.  After all, it is a happy place for me -- gives me time to reflect on good friends and good memories.

Will I get back to blogging on a regular basis?  I hope to.  There are still things to do that will likely keep me otherwise occupied.